Desperation in the Days of Mourning

We are deeply in to the nine days of mourning approaching Tisha B’Av.
Traditionally, this was when Jews mourn the destruction of both the First and Second Temples….
but I am working to allow space this week for the mourning of all of the things we often don’t stop and take the time to mourn….
and this week feels extraordinarily ripe for mourning and for desperation.
It has been the hottest and driest year on this farm… since before the current occupants lived here at least.
Our rain barrels are empty.
Siphoning water into a cistern on the back of a truck from the pond was keeping us going…. but people are becoming weary….

Today we were told that it’s time to give up.
Our deadline for fundraising for our beloved Bat Chava has been shortened from possible months to thirty days.
We have thirty days to raise $500,000 now.
I do not know how to do that.
If I do not figure out how to do that, then Davi, Avi, and I and Alison and all of the people who have donated money, time, effort, and love have worked so incredibly hard… for naught.

It is incredibly painful and daunting and I am at a loss.
The dry, cracked earth is desperately aching for water.
I am fearful of losing this dream we all poured so much of ourselves in to.

So… maybe it will rain.
Maybe the heavens will open up and pour fresh, cool water down and calm the burning soil and the thirsty ducks.
and maybe we will find the funds to save the dreams and the future we have been dutifully heading towards.

Either way, I am hosting an evening made for mourning this upcoming Sunday at the farm… at 6 pm. It is Tisha B’Av after all.
We can make space to mourn the lack of rain, the exhaustion of our mother earth, or our lost childhoods, any missing joys we may be feeling…. anything will be welcome to be shared, to be mourned and to be allowed to rest.
Please, let me know if you are going to join us.

Here is the link for our Go Fund Me:

any amount will help get us to our goal… and if you haven’t any funds (like many of us) a share would go a very long way.
We are deeply grateful for you.
For you joining us on this journey, for attending events and dinners, for singing, drum banging, meal making… for all the things.

We love and appreciate you and we hope that your journey through the days of mourning are liberating and fruitful.


and all the rest of us by proxy.

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